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Disposable Thanksgiving

November 25, 2014

Holiday stress is the stuff of legends here in America. My wife and I were recently discussing a family that has multiple issues and problems with an expectation that they will have an Ozzie and Harriet Thanksgiving, (you younger people can Google that reference!) Lots of cooking and setup, lots of mess, and mostly women cleaning up…

I am confident that the Pilgrims did not have Turkey china! Yes, we have a 12 place setting of special Thanksgiving china with a platter big enough to hold a 30 pound bird! When my mother-in-law gave all of that to my wife, it was a true trauma. It was a signal that the responsibility for directing the chaos of massive feasts had been passed to my wife. Understand that she was well into her 80s when this event occurred!

So upon analyzing the stress points of Thanksgiving, we ascertained that much of the stress centers on cleanup. Sure everyone knows that, but what have you done about it? This year, we are giving you permission to use disposable everything! (No comments about recycling, recycle if you want, don’t be a hater!)

This starts with the aluminum thing you cook the turkey in. Why not use disposable aluminum things to cook a lot more stuff in? Casseroles, gooey messy stuff of all sorts! Pies, for the love of God! Is there someone out there that loves to scrub pots and pans? Maybe?

Make Jello in folded paper plates! Have everyone mash their own potatoes! Really, is that hard to do? This isn’t rocket science!

We have matching Thanksgiving in printed paper plates and napkins. We have plastic forks, knives, and spoons that are hard to break. There will be no requirement to sit at the table except for microhumans. Everyone is responsible for tossing their own stuff. Will it look like Martha Stewart lives in our house? No, but she doesn’t live here anyway…

This strategy will create the most stress-free Thanksgiving in the history of Thanksgivings and there will be unfamiliar life forms sitting on the couch cheering on their team… There might be a battle for the Lazy Boys, but the mood is going to be a lot brighter!

Happy T-Day!thanksgiving stress


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